TGI mother fuckin FRIYAY 💯
Today started off as any normal day, just with a little bit more excitement because it’s Friday and everyone seems a little happier on a Friday. So I got dressed, had a large glass of chocolate milk, kissed my boyfriend goodbye as he was eating ice cream for breakfast-because for some reason he never gains weight…stupid fuck. and I just popped an Adderall and threw up my chocolate milk.
I arrive at work, 15 minutes late as per usual-NBD. I like probably 3 people here, some I just pretend to like, which is EXTREMELY hard at times when I want to tell them to STFU. But my good friend *Shirley came up to me with something interesting…a dick pic. Now you really gotta wonder who on earth would send a dick pic. 1. she doesn’t necessarily know this guy. 2. you can’t send a dick pic via text- at least use snap chat. 3. it’s not like she can respond with anything negative- you can’t respond with “haha”. Even if this is the smallest baby portabella you’ve ever seen, you still have to respond with something dramatic like “HOLY SHITAKE!” because he is only sending this picture for his already damaged ego. Her response was “nice”…she hasn’t heard from him since (think that was the point)
In other interesting news- I just checked Facebook (mostly to see if my boyfriend is online- WHERE the F ARE YOU 🙈) and I saw this guy that I met a few times in college and who was openly and flamboyantly gay got engaged- to a super hot GIRL.
But more importantly- we have Bill Maher who gives ZERO fucks and lit a joint and smoked it on live TV because he thinks weed should be legal in all 50 states. 100% with ya Billy. – he’s now being sued 1.7million dollars by the FCC.
Cheers to the WEEKEND! 🎉🍾